From the time a now viral video from The Scene, featuring a woman in an intimate discussion with her ex about why he cheated, hit the Internet, it drove viewers crazy and spawned the social media hashtag #HurtBae.
Her name is Kourtney Jorge. His name is Leonard Long III. And the two of them together, though unintentionally, are teaching Christian women 3 powerful lessons on dating and relationships.
Before getting into what those lessons are, let’s establish a brief bit of background.
In this wildly popular video, Kourtney and Leonard's dramatic story unfolds to the public while the two are sitting face-to-face against a grey backdrop with soft music playing in the background, adding to the conversation's emotional intensity.
The former couple started out as best friends who met in college and wound up dating for three years. Leonard admittedly cheated on his loyal girlfriend multiple—countless—times with no concern for her feelings, as you will see when you download or press play on the video below.
Her name is Kourtney Jorge. His name is Leonard Long III. And the two of them together, though unintentionally, are teaching Christian women 3 powerful lessons on dating and relationships.
Before getting into what those lessons are, let’s establish a brief bit of background.
In this wildly popular video, Kourtney and Leonard's dramatic story unfolds to the public while the two are sitting face-to-face against a grey backdrop with soft music playing in the background, adding to the conversation's emotional intensity.
The former couple started out as best friends who met in college and wound up dating for three years. Leonard admittedly cheated on his loyal girlfriend multiple—countless—times with no concern for her feelings, as you will see when you download or press play on the video below.
WATCH VIDEO BELOW
Lesson #1: If he has a lustful heart and isn't committed to the Lord, he will hurt you.
I have been Kourtney, sadly, more than once. Though I have since matured with the help of the Lord (after a lot of mistakes due to my own unwillingness to face truth), I have learned something. A man has to want to be faithful. Leonard had no desire to be in a monogamous, committed relationship, so he cheated. His heart was given over to lust and he was happy doing whatever he wanted, with whoever he wanted to do it. You can't build a solid relationship or any type of healthy, happy future with a man like that.
You must want a man whose heart belongs to the Lord more than you just want a man. He has to have a passion for pleasing God and honoring the Lord with his lifestyle. Otherwise, no matter how good of a girlfriend you are, how sweet, beautiful, accommodating, or even forgiving, a man given to lust will play the field on you. He will hurt you.
Lesson #2: Value yourself enough to expect biblical treatment from your man.
As a Christian woman, you must value yourself enough that, if a man does not exemplify biblical attributes in the way he treats you, you will leave him, knowing fully that you deserve better. A man with husband potential will love you selflessly, "just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" as Ephesians 5:25 says.
One of the most heartbreaking lines in the video is uttered by Kourtney when she expresses that she knew Leonard was cheating, but didn't leave. Her reason for staying, she said, is "because you're my best friend." That was gut-wrenching. The emotion on her face and the tears falling from her eyes tells how wounded she was and still remains.
But Kourtney is a classic example of millions of women who sympathize with, put up with, and stay with a man who is unfaithful because they love him too much to move on. I know that feeling. But as a Christian woman, let the Bible be your guide. Know that God wants and has better for you. He has someone who will love you the right way: sacrificially and selflessly.
Lesson #3: Trust your discernment and let it guide your actions.
Women who aren't in a relationship with God often talk about women's intuition and how they get a feeling in their gut when something isn't right. As a woman of faith, who is guided by spiritual discernment (the divine ability to distinguish truth from falsehood), you have an even more keen awareness of what's going on. Don't ignore what God reveals!
Like Kourtney, who no longer trusted Leonard and started going through his phone to confirm her suspicions, you know how it is when you sense that something rotten is happening.
Be wise. Let God lead you. If the Lord is dealing with your heart, showing you things, sending you signs that something is off, trust Him and respond by moving on. If you feel like you have to become a private investigator and stalk your man to try to keep him from straying, that's not the way to go. If his heart isn't in the relationship and you already know the God-revealed truth in your spirit, it's time to make a the wise choice and move forward, no matter how badly it hurts.
I've been #HurtBae before and you may have, too. But that's not God's will for your life. If you've been broken in an unhealthy relationship, learn the lesson from it and be resolved to draw close enough to God that you will be led by Him going forward.
If you are currently in a situation and you know it's a toxic romance that needs to end, ask God to give you the strength and courage to walk away. He will heal your heart and bring you someone better.
I have been Kourtney, sadly, more than once. Though I have since matured with the help of the Lord (after a lot of mistakes due to my own unwillingness to face truth), I have learned something. A man has to want to be faithful. Leonard had no desire to be in a monogamous, committed relationship, so he cheated. His heart was given over to lust and he was happy doing whatever he wanted, with whoever he wanted to do it. You can't build a solid relationship or any type of healthy, happy future with a man like that.
You must want a man whose heart belongs to the Lord more than you just want a man. He has to have a passion for pleasing God and honoring the Lord with his lifestyle. Otherwise, no matter how good of a girlfriend you are, how sweet, beautiful, accommodating, or even forgiving, a man given to lust will play the field on you. He will hurt you.
Lesson #2: Value yourself enough to expect biblical treatment from your man.
As a Christian woman, you must value yourself enough that, if a man does not exemplify biblical attributes in the way he treats you, you will leave him, knowing fully that you deserve better. A man with husband potential will love you selflessly, "just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" as Ephesians 5:25 says.
One of the most heartbreaking lines in the video is uttered by Kourtney when she expresses that she knew Leonard was cheating, but didn't leave. Her reason for staying, she said, is "because you're my best friend." That was gut-wrenching. The emotion on her face and the tears falling from her eyes tells how wounded she was and still remains.
But Kourtney is a classic example of millions of women who sympathize with, put up with, and stay with a man who is unfaithful because they love him too much to move on. I know that feeling. But as a Christian woman, let the Bible be your guide. Know that God wants and has better for you. He has someone who will love you the right way: sacrificially and selflessly.
Lesson #3: Trust your discernment and let it guide your actions.
Women who aren't in a relationship with God often talk about women's intuition and how they get a feeling in their gut when something isn't right. As a woman of faith, who is guided by spiritual discernment (the divine ability to distinguish truth from falsehood), you have an even more keen awareness of what's going on. Don't ignore what God reveals!
Like Kourtney, who no longer trusted Leonard and started going through his phone to confirm her suspicions, you know how it is when you sense that something rotten is happening.
Be wise. Let God lead you. If the Lord is dealing with your heart, showing you things, sending you signs that something is off, trust Him and respond by moving on. If you feel like you have to become a private investigator and stalk your man to try to keep him from straying, that's not the way to go. If his heart isn't in the relationship and you already know the God-revealed truth in your spirit, it's time to make a the wise choice and move forward, no matter how badly it hurts.
I've been #HurtBae before and you may have, too. But that's not God's will for your life. If you've been broken in an unhealthy relationship, learn the lesson from it and be resolved to draw close enough to God that you will be led by Him going forward.
If you are currently in a situation and you know it's a toxic romance that needs to end, ask God to give you the strength and courage to walk away. He will heal your heart and bring you someone better.
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